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cyberuser:

cyberuser:

vvankinq:

cyberuser:

what do you call a message sent by a girl?

*sighs* what

a feMAIL

i got 7 messages saying this joke is offensive & that i’m the reason feminism exists

(Source: snails135, via jealousvirgin)

(Source: buckysbarnes, via jealousvirgin)

narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

(via jealousvirgin)

sassy-brain:

I JUST FOUND COMEDIC GOLD ON A PORN WEBSITE OMFG

I WAS LOOKING UP PORN TO SHOW MY ROOMMATE WHO JAMES DEEN IS AND I FOUND A GUY WHO CALLS HIMSELF LIMERICK LARRY AND HE WRITES POEMS ABOUT THE PORN VIDEOS

I CAN’T BREATHE

(via jealousvirgin)

dancinglashatumbai:

the gay agenda

or as i call it

the homoschedule 

(via jealousvirgin)

beawilderment:

he’s making it hop

this is the only thing I care about

(Source: -everdeen, via jealousvirgin)

(Source: tastefullyoffensive, via radmatazz)

xekstrin:

The best part of adventure time will always be how much these two genuinely love each other

(Source: thespoonmissioner, via jealousvirgin)